Mandy, my crush!
I was sitting under a tree. Reading history. Damn this exam. I hate school so much. I don’t care about exam. Why don’t just make it easier for everyone by letting us pass? Then I saw someone and it caught my attention. A pretty girl who had just passed me. I never saw this girl before. I think she’s new to the school. My eyes followed her as she made her way to her class. Just next to my class, yes! I found out later that her name is Mandy.
- Hello Jim. I have been waiting for you.
Another one waiting for me. Why am I not surprise? But Mandy’s dead?
- Mandy, you’re dead too?
Harsh word I know, but that's the only word that lingers in my mind now.
- Yes. Long time ago.
- What? When? How?
- Slowly Jim. We have all the time we need.
Pardon me, but actually I never had the chance to talk to her. Not even in school when where passed by each other almost every day. I was 17, will be sitting for SPM that year and yes, she’s new to the school. Hearing her voice now seem rather awkward. And when I finally did, we were both dead.
- I know Jim, we never talk to each other. In so many time when we were at school, I want to talk to you but I’m afraid that I’m going to overdo it.
- What do you mean?
- I died 1 year after our SPM exam... I was doing my matriculation at that time.
- What? I didn’t know...
- Yes, you didn’t. You didn’t bother to ask our other friends. I saw you when you receive your flying colours result. You are too occupied with being successful. Your result were outstanding I know but you forgot your promise. I was standing there unnoticed by you.
- I am so sorry Mandy. I....
- It’s okay. I don’t mind but do you still remember your promise?
- Erm.... What promise?
- Oh Jim, you really broke my heart. Your letter. Last day of SPM. You said you are going to meet me when we take our result together.
- Gosh... I am so sorry... I was...
- You were too much of yourself Jim.
- It wasn’t totally my fault. I was so excited.
- That’s very vicious to say. You are not the Jim I heard so much about. Remember Dilla?
- She told me how you have been asking about me almost all the time and as a girl, I feel honoured because she said that you really like me. But where’s your effort to show that?
- You were playing hard to get...
- I was shy...
- I was all over you. I wrote your everywhere name in my book and Mr. Nadzrie happens to read it. Then I stop writing your name. I told Dilla about it and I bet she told you as well.
- Jim, I am a very plain girl. You can’t possible expect me to get to you first. And yes Dilla told me about that. And why didn’t you try to contact me after the exam?
- How could I? I have no idea where you are...
- If you really like me, you will try to find me. That’s how it goes.
- I know... Tell me Mandy, how did you died?
- Accident. Same as you. I was riding a bike when a car hit me from the back. I was at the hospital, coma for 3 weeks until I finally lost it. It was sad moment but it had to happen. I was so weak. I broke my spinal and cracked my skull. I lost so much blood and my heart was swollen and wounded because of the great impact to the road. I was thrown to the grown you see. It was painful.
- I am so sorry Mandy. It must be hard for you.
It was the Talent Night, an annual event where the students got the chance to showcase their talents. And Mandy was even beautiful that night. And she sings. She sung ‘Think of Me’ the sound track of The Phantom of the Opera. Her lovely voice, she’s like the school’s song bird. Oh, how I fell for her.
Think of me,
Think of me fondly,
When we’ll say goodbye.
Once in a while,
Please promise me you’ll try...
- You are the reason I was so enthusiastic to go to school. And I heard you are a smart student so I tried so hard to be one too. I never knew studying could be fun. And hard at times. I don’t like school and I don’t like books even. But it’s you Mandy. It’s because of you I am who I am now. I mean, before. Not now...Not here..
- But you changed Jim. You use to be very cheerful. Considerate. Very kind. You’re a funny guy. You liked me...
- The moment that I know I can succeed in my studies was the moment I need to focus for a better goal Mandy...
- I know Jim. Just don’t forget where you are from...
I guess it’s too late for that now. Too late for everything. Yes, I used to like you but I need to achieve my dreams. And yes, it’s all thanks to you. The crush I have had for you made me what I am now.
The next thing I know, Mandy is gone...
And Arthur is standing there with a book...
CNY Break 2017
5 weeks ago