Posts
Hurting all over
11 hours ago
Help Haiti :(
I know it's a bit out of date to post this entry but still it's an on going thing that we can spend a little of our time to think about. A massive earthquake struck Haiti just before 5 p.m. on January 12. The quake was the worst in the region in more than 200 years. A preliminary assessment from Haiti's government put the body count at 150,000 on January 23rd. Now that's a big number guys. Imagine if it happened here, probably more that halp of Kota Kinabalu will be gone with the ashes (touch wood).
And yes, many people of the world had been paying their concern by donating money, food, clothes, medications etc, being a volunteers, also words of prayer, the least. In Hollywood, actor George Clooney had hosted a commercial-free telethon called Hope for Haiti presented to raise funds for victims of the earthquake and was aired on MTV, joined by Haitian Jean and other pop music and movie stars in the Hollywood.
Now, what are our part in this matter? What can we do? When I went to Kompleks Karamunsing last week, I saw a group of volunteers asking donations for Haiti. It made me smile to see this. I took out whatever I can afford from my wallet and inserted it inside their donation box. I don't mean to brag, I'm just sharing. Really wish I can do more.
And also, Facebook had came out a simple way for us to donate; simply by clicking. I don't know how they are going to do it and I don't care if there's fraud or cheating in this application. I just know that we are suppose to be giving 'it' sincerely and with open heart. What happen next, it's God's will. So guys, this is the least thing we can do, after prayer. Let's us together, help the poor Haitian. It's still not to late for us to play our part, as a part of the world.
And yes, many people of the world had been paying their concern by donating money, food, clothes, medications etc, being a volunteers, also words of prayer, the least. In Hollywood, actor George Clooney had hosted a commercial-free telethon called Hope for Haiti presented to raise funds for victims of the earthquake and was aired on MTV, joined by Haitian Jean and other pop music and movie stars in the Hollywood.
Now, what are our part in this matter? What can we do? When I went to Kompleks Karamunsing last week, I saw a group of volunteers asking donations for Haiti. It made me smile to see this. I took out whatever I can afford from my wallet and inserted it inside their donation box. I don't mean to brag, I'm just sharing. Really wish I can do more.
And also, Facebook had came out a simple way for us to donate; simply by clicking. I don't know how they are going to do it and I don't care if there's fraud or cheating in this application. I just know that we are suppose to be giving 'it' sincerely and with open heart. What happen next, it's God's will. So guys, this is the least thing we can do, after prayer. Let's us together, help the poor Haitian. It's still not to late for us to play our part, as a part of the world.
Kionsom Waterfall
Kionsom waterfall; one of the weekend gateway spot for those who are residing in the city of Kota Kinalalu and its surrounding area. I should say, this place is cool. Last weekend, my close friends and I went to check the place out after not being there for quite sometimes now. At first, it was raining when we make our way but upon reaching, surprisingly, it was only drizzling there. I think, we were blessed. In this entry, I want to share with all of you, what it's like to be there :)
Wasn't the beautiful?
A fun shower :)
This is how the waterfall looks like
The B&W version of the waterfall
One of my close friend
Entah apa dia buat tu :p
Another friend of mine
Those who were there :)
Photography wise, I'm still learning and needed to improve more everytime. Place wise, beautiful :)
My Sunset Collection
I'm going to rest from writing the story of the death, if I may call it that, for a while. Hahaha. Thanks to all of you who had been reading and leaving comments. The next part will be uploaded from time to time and I do hope that you guys will take the time to glance at it. Writing has always been my passion since I know how to read and write so a very big thanks to all of you.
Latest, I was all coped with so many things and I seriously need a time of my own. I was browsing my photo collections just now and I found these series of sunset photos. I love photography and I know most of you guys are too. I 'backpacked' my camera every where I go, wishing that I will find a moment in which I can relate to myself. These are my sunset collection. by the way. It can also be viewed at Nedelicious Photo Journal.
Latest, I was all coped with so many things and I seriously need a time of my own. I was browsing my photo collections just now and I found these series of sunset photos. I love photography and I know most of you guys are too. I 'backpacked' my camera every where I go, wishing that I will find a moment in which I can relate to myself. These are my sunset collection. by the way. It can also be viewed at Nedelicious Photo Journal.
From Simpang Mengayau (Tips of Borneo), Kudat, Sabah.
Another sunset view from the Tips of Borne0
I personally love this one. Also the view from the Tips of Borneo
This is the view from the green forest of Ulu Kukut. I was driving to KK when this moment holds infront of me and I just cannot helped myself but to stop and shoot it
Another view from Ulu Kukut
I'm still learning. Thanks to a bunch of cool friends, I learnt more every day.
8 People You Are Going To Meet In Heaven (Part 9)
The Revelation
- Wake up father.
I don’t know how long I’ve been lying on the floor till that voice woke me up. I felt so weak still but I force myself to stand.
- I passed out?
- Yes.
- How long?
- A single second in heaven is a thousand years on earth.
I regained my strength after hearing that. It’s something I learn long time ago. From the Bible, yes. But hearing it out from a child’s mouth seems absurd. This boy is something.
- Who are you again? What’s your name?
- Jimmy Adreal Junior and I am not you.
- Then what’s with the name?
- That’s the name you gave to me. I’m your son...
- My what?!
How could it be? I’m not married... Oh, did I?
The Drawings
As long as I can remember, which I am so sure of, I wasn’t married to anyone. If you claim that it might be from one of my girlfriends, then I beg to differ. I practiced safe sex. Not in my entire life did I sleep with anyone without proper, erm, protection. Yes, that’s the word. Oh you know what I mean. And don’t you dare say it’s a sin. I know exactly what it is but prefer not to discuss it. At least, not here. It’s heaven, remember.
- I am your son.
- No, you’re not. I don’t have a son.
- Yes, you do. I am your son.
- Then who’s your mother?
- I don’t have any. I wish I know but I don’t.
- Ridiculous. How could you not have a mother?
- I am your son, if only you had married someone!
Oh, that’s a relief. If ONLY. Then, you’re not my son because it didn’t happen and will not happen. And who said anything about meeting people you haven’t met?
- Okay, logically speaking you’re not my son.
- I am your son. This drawing will prove it.
The boy handed me the drawing and I took it quickly. When I looked at the drawing, it was house. With some flowers infront of it. I also see stretch of clouds hiding the sun. A sun with a big smile. That’s funny, I thought.
- That was your drawing, father.
- Stop calling me that. And this is not my drawing.
- Yes, it’s yours.
- Not, it’s not.
- Yes. You drew that for a little girl you’ve met in the hospital years ago. She was an orphan.
Suddenly I remember something. Yes, that little girl in the park. Queen Elizabeth Hospital. The nurse said that she was suffering of heart cancer and has little hope. She is also an orphan.
- You drawn her this to give her hope. You said that she has to be strong and become a fighter. You said to her to never give up hope and believe that good deeds happens to good people. And you said that this is the house that she should build when she’s a grown up. You purposely drew as if you are a kindergarten. You thought that she could relate more to it if it’s a drawing of her same age. And she believed you. You put a smile on her face and more, you give her hope.
- Yes, I remember that.
- Then she started to ask you questions. Questions beyond your imaginary words. She asked you whether you have a house like that and what did you answer?
- I answered, yes.
- And then she asked you again, who is living in that house?
- I replied her only me.
- And what did you say when she ask you why?
- I said, for the time being, yes, there’s only me. But there will be more. I said that I will get married soon and have children.
- And she asked you what’s the name of you first child... Is it a boy or a girl?
- I answered her, I don’t know and I don’t mind. But perhaps a boy who will be just like me.
- And the name of the boy?
- Jimmy Adreal Junior!
- Wake up father.
I don’t know how long I’ve been lying on the floor till that voice woke me up. I felt so weak still but I force myself to stand.
- I passed out?
- Yes.
- How long?
- A single second in heaven is a thousand years on earth.
I regained my strength after hearing that. It’s something I learn long time ago. From the Bible, yes. But hearing it out from a child’s mouth seems absurd. This boy is something.
- Who are you again? What’s your name?
- Jimmy Adreal Junior and I am not you.
- Then what’s with the name?
- That’s the name you gave to me. I’m your son...
- My what?!
How could it be? I’m not married... Oh, did I?
The Drawings
As long as I can remember, which I am so sure of, I wasn’t married to anyone. If you claim that it might be from one of my girlfriends, then I beg to differ. I practiced safe sex. Not in my entire life did I sleep with anyone without proper, erm, protection. Yes, that’s the word. Oh you know what I mean. And don’t you dare say it’s a sin. I know exactly what it is but prefer not to discuss it. At least, not here. It’s heaven, remember.
- I am your son.
- No, you’re not. I don’t have a son.
- Yes, you do. I am your son.
- Then who’s your mother?
- I don’t have any. I wish I know but I don’t.
- Ridiculous. How could you not have a mother?
- I am your son, if only you had married someone!
Oh, that’s a relief. If ONLY. Then, you’re not my son because it didn’t happen and will not happen. And who said anything about meeting people you haven’t met?
- Okay, logically speaking you’re not my son.
- I am your son. This drawing will prove it.
The boy handed me the drawing and I took it quickly. When I looked at the drawing, it was house. With some flowers infront of it. I also see stretch of clouds hiding the sun. A sun with a big smile. That’s funny, I thought.
- That was your drawing, father.
- Stop calling me that. And this is not my drawing.
- Yes, it’s yours.
- Not, it’s not.
- Yes. You drew that for a little girl you’ve met in the hospital years ago. She was an orphan.
Suddenly I remember something. Yes, that little girl in the park. Queen Elizabeth Hospital. The nurse said that she was suffering of heart cancer and has little hope. She is also an orphan.
- You drawn her this to give her hope. You said that she has to be strong and become a fighter. You said to her to never give up hope and believe that good deeds happens to good people. And you said that this is the house that she should build when she’s a grown up. You purposely drew as if you are a kindergarten. You thought that she could relate more to it if it’s a drawing of her same age. And she believed you. You put a smile on her face and more, you give her hope.
- Yes, I remember that.
- Then she started to ask you questions. Questions beyond your imaginary words. She asked you whether you have a house like that and what did you answer?
- I answered, yes.
- And then she asked you again, who is living in that house?
- I replied her only me.
- And what did you say when she ask you why?
- I said, for the time being, yes, there’s only me. But there will be more. I said that I will get married soon and have children.
- And she asked you what’s the name of you first child... Is it a boy or a girl?
- I answered her, I don’t know and I don’t mind. But perhaps a boy who will be just like me.
- And the name of the boy?
- Jimmy Adreal Junior!
8 People You Are Going To Meet In Heaven (Part 8)
A Serious Event
The meeting with Lester, it’s a total shock for me. Suddenly I felt so embarrass that I need something to cover off my face. I was lost. I wasn’t the only one and yet I preached to everyone that I WAS. As annoying as it may seems. But honestly, I wasn’t bragging. I didn’t know. Or I don’t want to know. Or I refused to know...
And my other colleagues, what if they know that I wasn’t the only one? Or, have they come to know about this long time ago? This is crazy. I DIDN’T know. That’s the whole point. Surely I will befriend them if I only knew.
Oh wait. I did know. I did realize that they were there. Lester. Yes, I know him. I know he’s been working with Dr. Anderson. I’ve received and read the invitation for the choir practice. Yes, I knew their existence. Then, why did I ignore them? Why did I tell everyone that I was the only one?
- You popped so many questions in your mind as if you are capable of doing something about it.
Arthur, my so-called guardian angel suddenly appears again before me. I hadn’t notice his coming as I was so busy trying to make sense of everything. And Lester, he vanished after answering my last question? Did he come only to make remember that they were there too? A fact of the matter which tries to say that I have been putting too many words on myself that wasn’t true?
- Jim, remember, every person you meet come for a reason. A very big one which implies you and your life before.
- But why now Arthur? Are these people trying to make fun of me? Trying to make me feel bad about myself? There’s nothing I can do about this now. And I feel ashamed even to pray forgiveness for it.
- When did you last feel bad about yourself Jim? Tell me when...
I look at Arthur’s naval face. It’s bright shining skin tone. The clear crystal eyes. The smile of just and fairness. And he is still holding the book.
I couldn’t answer Arthur’s question. I turned around and tried to walk down my memory lane for bits of answer but I felt nothing. Numb. As if I was fenced in a small room with neither door nor window to look out to. As if there’s nothing inside my mind that I can think of. Not even a spark of idea.
I turned again, facing Arthur. I felt empty. I just wish that I could cry. But I couldn’t. I collapsed on my own feet and wrap my hands on my face. It felt heavy and unbearable. The postman, Mandy and now Lester. Who is next?
- Jim, when people die, they left everything they have. You couldn’t take anything with you. There are so many plans for you but you refused to take your call. You ignore your inner self and let alone your world spirit take control of your deepest need. But you have to meet another 5 people Jim. And in this book, you will find great attributes about yourself but be patience because there’s time for everything. Don’t ever open this book until you really feel the need to open it.
Arthur handed me the book and disappear in a blink of an eye.
And I was left again, to meet my fourth person. At that time, I was lying on my back thinking how pathetic my life was.
The Secret
- Father...
I don’t know how long had it been until I heard a voice. A very soft one. Small. Cute. A voice where you can sense smile and warmth. And compassion. And love.
- Father... This is me. Jimmy Adreal Junior.
- Oh what?!
By that time, I was already standing. I saw a little cute boy with a stripe shirt and a short khaki. He’s holding a piece of paper.
- What did you say your name again?
- Jimmy Adreal Junior.
- Oh, I get it. You’re me when I’m little...
I was smiling to myself. Oh, how cute I was. I was a petite boy when I was little. I was shorter than any of my friends. But I was known to them as the little rascal. A planner of disaster with the mind of a criminal. Oh, how funny it was; how disastrous my plan can be.
- Jim, this is too much. You cannot pun a dead chicken with no head hanging on somebody’s door!
Josie, a neighbour of mine said to me when I was about to hand a dead hen filled with blood all over its feathers in front of Mrs. Callet’s house.
- Oh shut up Josie. This is a joke. Mrs. Callet will find it very funny.
A minute after Jim had successfully hung the dead chicken infront of Mrs. Callet’s house, Jim throw little stones towards the door. We could hear the footsteps of Mrs. Callet coming to the door. When she opened the door, I could see her shocked facial expression before felling to the floor. And we thought that was funny but it was not.
She was 89 and she died that instant because of shock. Right there, in front of the door. Despite the fact that the people in our community thought that some bad-crazy people purposely hung the dead chicken in front of Mrs. Callet, we vowed to ourselves, both Josie and I, to never tell anyone the truth. Yes, of course we were scared and feel guilty. And dying was not part of the plan. But we kept silent about it up until now.
We never talk to each other after that. I don’t eat chicken anymore. The idea of being a criminal vanished when I enter secondary school. And for the past elementary years, every night was a nightmare for me.
- No, I’m not the young version of you.
The voice brought me back to my conscious. I was sweating suddenly and the guilt was all over me again. My heart beats faster than before and my legs seem weaker. The thought of being a murderer creeps me to my bone. I have forgotten that incident as if it never happened. And I fell again on the black smoky-cool storey.
(This is not the original Part 8 actually. I've made last minute changes to it.. Hmm... The original Part 8 will replace Part 9 or Part 10 or 11... oh, I don't know... The original Part 8 scares me!)
The meeting with Lester, it’s a total shock for me. Suddenly I felt so embarrass that I need something to cover off my face. I was lost. I wasn’t the only one and yet I preached to everyone that I WAS. As annoying as it may seems. But honestly, I wasn’t bragging. I didn’t know. Or I don’t want to know. Or I refused to know...
And my other colleagues, what if they know that I wasn’t the only one? Or, have they come to know about this long time ago? This is crazy. I DIDN’T know. That’s the whole point. Surely I will befriend them if I only knew.
Oh wait. I did know. I did realize that they were there. Lester. Yes, I know him. I know he’s been working with Dr. Anderson. I’ve received and read the invitation for the choir practice. Yes, I knew their existence. Then, why did I ignore them? Why did I tell everyone that I was the only one?
- You popped so many questions in your mind as if you are capable of doing something about it.
Arthur, my so-called guardian angel suddenly appears again before me. I hadn’t notice his coming as I was so busy trying to make sense of everything. And Lester, he vanished after answering my last question? Did he come only to make remember that they were there too? A fact of the matter which tries to say that I have been putting too many words on myself that wasn’t true?
- Jim, remember, every person you meet come for a reason. A very big one which implies you and your life before.
- But why now Arthur? Are these people trying to make fun of me? Trying to make me feel bad about myself? There’s nothing I can do about this now. And I feel ashamed even to pray forgiveness for it.
- When did you last feel bad about yourself Jim? Tell me when...
I look at Arthur’s naval face. It’s bright shining skin tone. The clear crystal eyes. The smile of just and fairness. And he is still holding the book.
I couldn’t answer Arthur’s question. I turned around and tried to walk down my memory lane for bits of answer but I felt nothing. Numb. As if I was fenced in a small room with neither door nor window to look out to. As if there’s nothing inside my mind that I can think of. Not even a spark of idea.
I turned again, facing Arthur. I felt empty. I just wish that I could cry. But I couldn’t. I collapsed on my own feet and wrap my hands on my face. It felt heavy and unbearable. The postman, Mandy and now Lester. Who is next?
- Jim, when people die, they left everything they have. You couldn’t take anything with you. There are so many plans for you but you refused to take your call. You ignore your inner self and let alone your world spirit take control of your deepest need. But you have to meet another 5 people Jim. And in this book, you will find great attributes about yourself but be patience because there’s time for everything. Don’t ever open this book until you really feel the need to open it.
Arthur handed me the book and disappear in a blink of an eye.
And I was left again, to meet my fourth person. At that time, I was lying on my back thinking how pathetic my life was.
The Secret
- Father...
I don’t know how long had it been until I heard a voice. A very soft one. Small. Cute. A voice where you can sense smile and warmth. And compassion. And love.
- Father... This is me. Jimmy Adreal Junior.
- Oh what?!
By that time, I was already standing. I saw a little cute boy with a stripe shirt and a short khaki. He’s holding a piece of paper.
- What did you say your name again?
- Jimmy Adreal Junior.
- Oh, I get it. You’re me when I’m little...
I was smiling to myself. Oh, how cute I was. I was a petite boy when I was little. I was shorter than any of my friends. But I was known to them as the little rascal. A planner of disaster with the mind of a criminal. Oh, how funny it was; how disastrous my plan can be.
***
- Jim, this is too much. You cannot pun a dead chicken with no head hanging on somebody’s door!
Josie, a neighbour of mine said to me when I was about to hand a dead hen filled with blood all over its feathers in front of Mrs. Callet’s house.
- Oh shut up Josie. This is a joke. Mrs. Callet will find it very funny.
A minute after Jim had successfully hung the dead chicken infront of Mrs. Callet’s house, Jim throw little stones towards the door. We could hear the footsteps of Mrs. Callet coming to the door. When she opened the door, I could see her shocked facial expression before felling to the floor. And we thought that was funny but it was not.
She was 89 and she died that instant because of shock. Right there, in front of the door. Despite the fact that the people in our community thought that some bad-crazy people purposely hung the dead chicken in front of Mrs. Callet, we vowed to ourselves, both Josie and I, to never tell anyone the truth. Yes, of course we were scared and feel guilty. And dying was not part of the plan. But we kept silent about it up until now.
We never talk to each other after that. I don’t eat chicken anymore. The idea of being a criminal vanished when I enter secondary school. And for the past elementary years, every night was a nightmare for me.
***
- No, I’m not the young version of you.
The voice brought me back to my conscious. I was sweating suddenly and the guilt was all over me again. My heart beats faster than before and my legs seem weaker. The thought of being a murderer creeps me to my bone. I have forgotten that incident as if it never happened. And I fell again on the black smoky-cool storey.
(This is not the original Part 8 actually. I've made last minute changes to it.. Hmm... The original Part 8 will replace Part 9 or Part 10 or 11... oh, I don't know... The original Part 8 scares me!)
8 People You Are Going To Meet In Heaven (Part 7)
Third Person Jim Meets
- Hello... Do you remember me?
A young guy appear before me. A very clean guy, I think he’s a college student or something like that. He’s wearing a grey t-shirt and a seasoned blue jeans. He’s holding a few books.
- Oh you won’t remember me...
- Please, help me recall.
- Well, we first met during Yale’s Open Day in PWTC. You were one of the students in charge of the exhibition.
Yes, Yale did hold an open day in Malaysia long ago. To mainly seek future students from this region. I was, fortunately, the ASIAN Student Council President and was directly involve in the exhibition.
- I was applying for Yale and you gave me the form. And after that I ask for your number, just in case if I am accepted, I might seek help from you.
- I’m sorry. I don’t really recall...
- You borrowed my pen to fill in your visa extension form that day...
Yeah, I remember that. I was so busy. I’ve totally forgotten that I need to renew my student’s visa pass. One of my friends was collecting the form but I have fill up mine yet. And too bad at that time, I don’t have any pen with me.
- I was there Jim. I let you borrow my pen although I was too, busy filling in my form.
- Yeah, I remember that. Thank you very much.
The guy infront of smile. Caressing his hair and stretch out his hand. Shaking me.
- Lester. Lester William.
Lester William? Now why does that name sound awkwardly familiar?
- I was the RA Dr. Anderson...
- No way...
- Yes!
Lester William. A first year student who manage to became the first ever Research Assistant of Dr. Anderson Roystone, a renowned lawyer and a lecturer in Yale Law School. Dr. Anderson had been working on a case which involves animal testing in beauty products which make it a very high profile case. And to be learning first hand from him will definitely be a privilege. Lester is one lucky guy.
- And you’re the third person I have to meet?
- Correct!
- And why is that so?
I noticed that there’s a change in my mode of speaking. Perhaps maybe, because I am infront of a rather successful lawyer, if I may assume.
- Jim, I come as a friend and meeting you isn’t my best interest. I just need to do this because everyone you met in your entire life had been an influence to you whether you noticed it or not. And I happened to be one...
- I figure that out long ago... Please, tell me your side of story of my life.
- I have nothing to say to you my friend. I just need to show myself to you till you yourself figure out why I’m here. Till then, we’ll be stuck here.
- Very well, tell me how you died...
- In case you hadn’t notice, I have leukaemia. I died 3 years after I graduated. I never really went for any legal practice. I stayed in Yale and tutored there, while doing my master. I don’t really like the idea of debating but I’m more into teaching.
- I see...
- And in case you hadn’t notice too, on several occasions, we were together. Student council meeting, Jerry’s birthday remember? The one that we have in the football field? That was awesome.
- Yeah it was...
- Christmas at the embassy 1981, you performed. You sang. I was there. I played the piano.
- Piano?
- Yale Malaysian Students Choir Group. We did invite you but we thought you’re just too busy. You never attended any of our choir practice
- Excuse me, you’re from Malaysia?
- From Sabah, to exact.
Shoot!
Who is Jim?
The only one from Sabah. Infact, the only one from Malaysia.
I was wrong. And I never knew...
- Hello... Do you remember me?
A young guy appear before me. A very clean guy, I think he’s a college student or something like that. He’s wearing a grey t-shirt and a seasoned blue jeans. He’s holding a few books.
- Oh you won’t remember me...
- Please, help me recall.
- Well, we first met during Yale’s Open Day in PWTC. You were one of the students in charge of the exhibition.
Yes, Yale did hold an open day in Malaysia long ago. To mainly seek future students from this region. I was, fortunately, the ASIAN Student Council President and was directly involve in the exhibition.
- I was applying for Yale and you gave me the form. And after that I ask for your number, just in case if I am accepted, I might seek help from you.
- I’m sorry. I don’t really recall...
- You borrowed my pen to fill in your visa extension form that day...
Yeah, I remember that. I was so busy. I’ve totally forgotten that I need to renew my student’s visa pass. One of my friends was collecting the form but I have fill up mine yet. And too bad at that time, I don’t have any pen with me.
- I was there Jim. I let you borrow my pen although I was too, busy filling in my form.
- Yeah, I remember that. Thank you very much.
The guy infront of smile. Caressing his hair and stretch out his hand. Shaking me.
- Lester. Lester William.
Lester William? Now why does that name sound awkwardly familiar?
- I was the RA Dr. Anderson...
- No way...
- Yes!
Lester William. A first year student who manage to became the first ever Research Assistant of Dr. Anderson Roystone, a renowned lawyer and a lecturer in Yale Law School. Dr. Anderson had been working on a case which involves animal testing in beauty products which make it a very high profile case. And to be learning first hand from him will definitely be a privilege. Lester is one lucky guy.
- And you’re the third person I have to meet?
- Correct!
- And why is that so?
I noticed that there’s a change in my mode of speaking. Perhaps maybe, because I am infront of a rather successful lawyer, if I may assume.
- Jim, I come as a friend and meeting you isn’t my best interest. I just need to do this because everyone you met in your entire life had been an influence to you whether you noticed it or not. And I happened to be one...
- I figure that out long ago... Please, tell me your side of story of my life.
- I have nothing to say to you my friend. I just need to show myself to you till you yourself figure out why I’m here. Till then, we’ll be stuck here.
- Very well, tell me how you died...
- In case you hadn’t notice, I have leukaemia. I died 3 years after I graduated. I never really went for any legal practice. I stayed in Yale and tutored there, while doing my master. I don’t really like the idea of debating but I’m more into teaching.
- I see...
- And in case you hadn’t notice too, on several occasions, we were together. Student council meeting, Jerry’s birthday remember? The one that we have in the football field? That was awesome.
- Yeah it was...
- Christmas at the embassy 1981, you performed. You sang. I was there. I played the piano.
- Piano?
- Yale Malaysian Students Choir Group. We did invite you but we thought you’re just too busy. You never attended any of our choir practice
- Excuse me, you’re from Malaysia?
- From Sabah, to exact.
Shoot!
Who is Jim?
The only one from Sabah. Infact, the only one from Malaysia.
I was wrong. And I never knew...
8 People You Are Going To Meet In Heaven (Part 6)
The One Thing Jim Had Forgotten
- Jim, do you believe in heaven?
- I don’t know.
- You used to know. Jim Before, when you were a little kid, you used to draw a big house you called Heaven. It has a bright light surrounding it and God is there. Opening his arm wide to welcome everyone. Then you show it to your mother. Then your father. You said, one day you will go to heaven.
That was long ago. I remember suddenly how I used to sing gospel songs when I was at the church. And when I go to bath, or whenever I was scared or alone. It made feel safe. And protected. Because the angels will sing with you. They will not judge how you sing, as long as you sing it from your heart. It just that, you can’t hear them... or, maybe yes if you listen carefully...
- I used to sing with you almost every day Jim. And I will tell you when you were off key. That’s why you always stop whenever you feel like you were out of the not. Then if you listen carefully with your heart, you will hear me singing in your ears. I don’t mean to judge you, just teaching you to be better.
- I was not a good singer.
- Yes you were. You sang beautifully. But you have forgotten that...
- I don’t know.
- You used to know. Jim Before, when you were a little kid, you used to draw a big house you called Heaven. It has a bright light surrounding it and God is there. Opening his arm wide to welcome everyone. Then you show it to your mother. Then your father. You said, one day you will go to heaven.
That was long ago. I remember suddenly how I used to sing gospel songs when I was at the church. And when I go to bath, or whenever I was scared or alone. It made feel safe. And protected. Because the angels will sing with you. They will not judge how you sing, as long as you sing it from your heart. It just that, you can’t hear them... or, maybe yes if you listen carefully...
- I used to sing with you almost every day Jim. And I will tell you when you were off key. That’s why you always stop whenever you feel like you were out of the not. Then if you listen carefully with your heart, you will hear me singing in your ears. I don’t mean to judge you, just teaching you to be better.
- I was not a good singer.
- Yes you were. You sang beautifully. But you have forgotten that...
It was an annual event. The Christmas Carol we used to have. I know people are still doing it now but I don’t really pay attention to that anymore. I was too occupied reading cases after cases. It’s a hand full you see. But Christmas had always been my favourite celebration. Yup, until now. I don’t really do much about Christmas during my last days of living but still I love Christmas.
- Jim, it’s your turn.
I was 11. I feel like I’m having a butterfly in my stomach. Cold sweats rushing down from my fore head. I’m not hot. I’m cold. No, I’m not cold. I’m scared. But I want to do this. I’m shy? No, I am not shy. Are those people going to like what they’re about to see?
And there I was, in front of them. Maybe in about 100 men and women. And boys and girls sitting in front. Everyone was quite. I shiverly hold the mic and the next thing I know, the audience are clapping and saying ‘very good’.
I had just sung Oh Holy Night!
***
- Jim, it’s your turn.
I was 11. I feel like I’m having a butterfly in my stomach. Cold sweats rushing down from my fore head. I’m not hot. I’m cold. No, I’m not cold. I’m scared. But I want to do this. I’m shy? No, I am not shy. Are those people going to like what they’re about to see?
And there I was, in front of them. Maybe in about 100 men and women. And boys and girls sitting in front. Everyone was quite. I shiverly hold the mic and the next thing I know, the audience are clapping and saying ‘very good’.
I had just sung Oh Holy Night!
***
Flood Again - In Our School
Yes, it happened again. The flood had been going on for years and every years it's like an annual event for us. Although we are ready for it every year, but till when? It's a sad thing for the school communities especially the students. These are some of the photos that I snapped and hope it says something to the authorities.
School Field
In front of the Teachers' Room
Below the classroom
The School's Open Hall
In front of the school compoundCross Country - The Photos
Okay, rehat sebentar daripada cerita orang mati ni. Nanti kamu cakap saya suka cerita pasal orang-orang mati sahaja pula.. Hahaha... Cerita tu hanya rekaan semata-mata dan hasil imaginasi saya sendiri. Sirinya suda siap sebenarnya tapi saya rasa lebih baik kalau diupload satu persatu.
Untuk kali ni, saya suka mengongsikan event yang berlaku di sekolah iaitu merentas desa. Buat kesekian kalinya, sekolah menganjurkan Kejohanan Merentas Desa Peringkat Sekolah. These might bring us back to our own experience of participating in a Cross Country and I'm pretty sure, all of us has our own story to tell. I know I have. These are some of the photos that I manage to upload. Take a tour :) These photos are also availabe at Nedelicious Photo Journal
Untuk kali ni, saya suka mengongsikan event yang berlaku di sekolah iaitu merentas desa. Buat kesekian kalinya, sekolah menganjurkan Kejohanan Merentas Desa Peringkat Sekolah. These might bring us back to our own experience of participating in a Cross Country and I'm pretty sure, all of us has our own story to tell. I know I have. These are some of the photos that I manage to upload. Take a tour :) These photos are also availabe at Nedelicious Photo Journal
8 People You Are Going To Meet In Heaven (Part 5)
Mandy, my crush!
I was sitting under a tree. Reading history. Damn this exam. I hate school so much. I don’t care about exam. Why don’t just make it easier for everyone by letting us pass? Then I saw someone and it caught my attention. A pretty girl who had just passed me. I never saw this girl before. I think she’s new to the school. My eyes followed her as she made her way to her class. Just next to my class, yes! I found out later that her name is Mandy.
- Hello Jim. I have been waiting for you.
Another one waiting for me. Why am I not surprise? But Mandy’s dead?
- Mandy, you’re dead too?
Harsh word I know, but that's the only word that lingers in my mind now.
- Yes. Long time ago.
- What? When? How?
- Slowly Jim. We have all the time we need.
Pardon me, but actually I never had the chance to talk to her. Not even in school when where passed by each other almost every day. I was 17, will be sitting for SPM that year and yes, she’s new to the school. Hearing her voice now seem rather awkward. And when I finally did, we were both dead.
- I know Jim, we never talk to each other. In so many time when we were at school, I want to talk to you but I’m afraid that I’m going to overdo it.
- What do you mean?
- I died 1 year after our SPM exam... I was doing my matriculation at that time.
- What? I didn’t know...
- Yes, you didn’t. You didn’t bother to ask our other friends. I saw you when you receive your flying colours result. You are too occupied with being successful. Your result were outstanding I know but you forgot your promise. I was standing there unnoticed by you.
- I am so sorry Mandy. I....
- It’s okay. I don’t mind but do you still remember your promise?
- Erm.... What promise?
- Oh Jim, you really broke my heart. Your letter. Last day of SPM. You said you are going to meet me when we take our result together.
- Gosh... I am so sorry... I was...
- You were too much of yourself Jim.
- It wasn’t totally my fault. I was so excited.
- That’s very vicious to say. You are not the Jim I heard so much about. Remember Dilla?
- Yeah...
- She told me how you have been asking about me almost all the time and as a girl, I feel honoured because she said that you really like me. But where’s your effort to show that?
- You were playing hard to get...
- I was shy...
- I was all over you. I wrote your everywhere name in my book and Mr. Nadzrie happens to read it. Then I stop writing your name. I told Dilla about it and I bet she told you as well.
- Jim, I am a very plain girl. You can’t possible expect me to get to you first. And yes Dilla told me about that. And why didn’t you try to contact me after the exam?
- How could I? I have no idea where you are...
- If you really like me, you will try to find me. That’s how it goes.
- I know... Tell me Mandy, how did you died?
- Accident. Same as you. I was riding a bike when a car hit me from the back. I was at the hospital, coma for 3 weeks until I finally lost it. It was sad moment but it had to happen. I was so weak. I broke my spinal and cracked my skull. I lost so much blood and my heart was swollen and wounded because of the great impact to the road. I was thrown to the grown you see. It was painful.
- I am so sorry Mandy. It must be hard for you.
It was the Talent Night, an annual event where the students got the chance to showcase their talents. And Mandy was even beautiful that night. And she sings. She sung ‘Think of Me’ the sound track of The Phantom of the Opera. Her lovely voice, she’s like the school’s song bird. Oh, how I fell for her.
Think of me,
Think of me fondly,
When we’ll say goodbye.
Remember me,
Once in a while,
Please promise me you’ll try...
- You are the reason I was so enthusiastic to go to school. And I heard you are a smart student so I tried so hard to be one too. I never knew studying could be fun. And hard at times. I don’t like school and I don’t like books even. But it’s you Mandy. It’s because of you I am who I am now. I mean, before. Not now...Not here..
- But you changed Jim. You use to be very cheerful. Considerate. Very kind. You’re a funny guy. You liked me...
- The moment that I know I can succeed in my studies was the moment I need to focus for a better goal Mandy...
- I know Jim. Just don’t forget where you are from...
I guess it’s too late for that now. Too late for everything. Yes, I used to like you but I need to achieve my dreams. And yes, it’s all thanks to you. The crush I have had for you made me what I am now.
The next thing I know, Mandy is gone...
And Arthur is standing there with a book...
I was sitting under a tree. Reading history. Damn this exam. I hate school so much. I don’t care about exam. Why don’t just make it easier for everyone by letting us pass? Then I saw someone and it caught my attention. A pretty girl who had just passed me. I never saw this girl before. I think she’s new to the school. My eyes followed her as she made her way to her class. Just next to my class, yes! I found out later that her name is Mandy.
- Hello Jim. I have been waiting for you.
Another one waiting for me. Why am I not surprise? But Mandy’s dead?
- Mandy, you’re dead too?
Harsh word I know, but that's the only word that lingers in my mind now.
- Yes. Long time ago.
- What? When? How?
- Slowly Jim. We have all the time we need.
Pardon me, but actually I never had the chance to talk to her. Not even in school when where passed by each other almost every day. I was 17, will be sitting for SPM that year and yes, she’s new to the school. Hearing her voice now seem rather awkward. And when I finally did, we were both dead.
- I know Jim, we never talk to each other. In so many time when we were at school, I want to talk to you but I’m afraid that I’m going to overdo it.
- What do you mean?
- I died 1 year after our SPM exam... I was doing my matriculation at that time.
- What? I didn’t know...
- Yes, you didn’t. You didn’t bother to ask our other friends. I saw you when you receive your flying colours result. You are too occupied with being successful. Your result were outstanding I know but you forgot your promise. I was standing there unnoticed by you.
- I am so sorry Mandy. I....
- It’s okay. I don’t mind but do you still remember your promise?
- Erm.... What promise?
- Oh Jim, you really broke my heart. Your letter. Last day of SPM. You said you are going to meet me when we take our result together.
- Gosh... I am so sorry... I was...
- You were too much of yourself Jim.
- It wasn’t totally my fault. I was so excited.
- That’s very vicious to say. You are not the Jim I heard so much about. Remember Dilla?
- Yeah...
- She told me how you have been asking about me almost all the time and as a girl, I feel honoured because she said that you really like me. But where’s your effort to show that?
- You were playing hard to get...
- I was shy...
- I was all over you. I wrote your everywhere name in my book and Mr. Nadzrie happens to read it. Then I stop writing your name. I told Dilla about it and I bet she told you as well.
- Jim, I am a very plain girl. You can’t possible expect me to get to you first. And yes Dilla told me about that. And why didn’t you try to contact me after the exam?
- How could I? I have no idea where you are...
- If you really like me, you will try to find me. That’s how it goes.
- I know... Tell me Mandy, how did you died?
- Accident. Same as you. I was riding a bike when a car hit me from the back. I was at the hospital, coma for 3 weeks until I finally lost it. It was sad moment but it had to happen. I was so weak. I broke my spinal and cracked my skull. I lost so much blood and my heart was swollen and wounded because of the great impact to the road. I was thrown to the grown you see. It was painful.
- I am so sorry Mandy. It must be hard for you.
It was the Talent Night, an annual event where the students got the chance to showcase their talents. And Mandy was even beautiful that night. And she sings. She sung ‘Think of Me’ the sound track of The Phantom of the Opera. Her lovely voice, she’s like the school’s song bird. Oh, how I fell for her.
Think of me,
Think of me fondly,
When we’ll say goodbye.
Remember me,
Once in a while,
Please promise me you’ll try...
- You are the reason I was so enthusiastic to go to school. And I heard you are a smart student so I tried so hard to be one too. I never knew studying could be fun. And hard at times. I don’t like school and I don’t like books even. But it’s you Mandy. It’s because of you I am who I am now. I mean, before. Not now...Not here..
- But you changed Jim. You use to be very cheerful. Considerate. Very kind. You’re a funny guy. You liked me...
- The moment that I know I can succeed in my studies was the moment I need to focus for a better goal Mandy...
- I know Jim. Just don’t forget where you are from...
I guess it’s too late for that now. Too late for everything. Yes, I used to like you but I need to achieve my dreams. And yes, it’s all thanks to you. The crush I have had for you made me what I am now.
The next thing I know, Mandy is gone...
And Arthur is standing there with a book...
8 People You Are Going To Meet In Heaven (Part 4)
Who is Jim?
Jimmy Adreal Simba, First Class LLB, Yale Law School.
How proud I was.
The only one from Sabah. Infact the only one from Malaysia.
I hate school and I almost dropped out. I realized my dream when I was Form 5. Moral of the story, it’s never too late to start something.
I am my own boss. I own a Legal firm based in Kota Kinabalu, Sabah. I represent mostly real estate company and the money is good.
I am single. No girlfriend. I am not gay!
I own a Golden Retriever named Alex.
I hate golf.
My definition of rest is sleep.
I have two cars. A Porsche and a Hummer!
I don’t go to clubs. I don’t go to pubs.
I love fencing.
I drink coffee when I’m working but not for breakfast. I love Chipsmore. I think it is delicious.
I have a mansion I call The Address. It has 7 bed rooms, a pool and a pool table. I also have a mini cinema for me to watch the news.
I am the only child in the family. My parents have long gone.
I enjoy travelling. But my favourite place, I have to say, Egypt.
Do business partners count as friends?
I am 39 years of age when I died. And I am rich.
Jimmy Adreal Simba, First Class LLB, Yale Law School.
How proud I was.
The only one from Sabah. Infact the only one from Malaysia.
I hate school and I almost dropped out. I realized my dream when I was Form 5. Moral of the story, it’s never too late to start something.
I am my own boss. I own a Legal firm based in Kota Kinabalu, Sabah. I represent mostly real estate company and the money is good.
I am single. No girlfriend. I am not gay!
I own a Golden Retriever named Alex.
I hate golf.
My definition of rest is sleep.
I have two cars. A Porsche and a Hummer!
I don’t go to clubs. I don’t go to pubs.
I love fencing.
I drink coffee when I’m working but not for breakfast. I love Chipsmore. I think it is delicious.
I have a mansion I call The Address. It has 7 bed rooms, a pool and a pool table. I also have a mini cinema for me to watch the news.
I am the only child in the family. My parents have long gone.
I enjoy travelling. But my favourite place, I have to say, Egypt.
Do business partners count as friends?
I am 39 years of age when I died. And I am rich.
8 People You Are Going To Meet In Heaven (Part 3)
The First Person Jim Meets
- Hello Jim.
- Hello...?
I was at home. Yeah. My home when I was 19. I can smell the wooden structure of my house. And my mother’s cooking. I can smell my father blowing smoke of his cigar. I look around but I see nobody.
- At ease Jim, relax. You’re in good hand.
- Who are you? Where am I?
- Clearly Jim, this is your house when you’re 19. You’re still living with your parents remember. And me, oh, you don’t know me. I don’t know you too. Not until I die. I have been waiting for you.
- Waiting for me? Wanting me dead?
- Don’t be confused my friend. I can wait forever for you. In utmost of my concern, I never wanted you to die, but yes, sooner or later, we will.
- Who are you?
- Let us sit down Jim and I will explain to you.
Suddenly, out of nowhere, two chairs appeared before us.
- Common, help yourself.
The man sits and looks at me. Direct to the eyes. I decided to stand.
- On your own good time, you will sit my friend. I’m here, as ordered, as the first person who will tell you the first part of your life. Happened to me when I die and now, my obligation is to wait for you. And trust me, you will too.
- What is this about? It’s cracking my head.
- Oh well, let me begin. My name is Stan and I am a postman. See this uniform. I was the guy who sent you the letter of acceptance to Yale. See it in your mind?
Then the image holds before me. It was 20 years ago. I was sitting down, reading newspaper. My mom was cooking and father was sitting while puffing his cigar. A man knocked at the door and I opened it.
- I remember you. You were the guy...
- Indeed I am. I was the guy who gave you the letter. You see Jim, being a postman is not easy. Early that morning, my boss and I had a big quarrel. He accused me of stealing a cheque that I have never seen before. But it was like any other day. I didn’t bother much because I know I didn’t steal the cheque. I remember that your big letter was the last letter I have to deliver that day. Right before that, my boss called and said that the police are looking for me. I panicked although I know, I was innocent. My boss said that I need to return the cheque or otherwise I’ll be in prison. I wanted to run away. Those days, your boss is your master. When they accuse you of something, you are guilty of it.
That is the time I sit.
- But you weren’t guilty. I remember watching television that night and the news said that your boss went bankrupt.
- Yes, true. Besides being the boss of our delivery company, he owns an entertainment club. He tried to run from bankruptcy and accused me of stealing his cheque. But remember Jim, this isn’t about me. This is about you.
- Yes...
- So you see Jim, I was riding my bike as usual and as stupid as I was that day, I did try to run away. But I remember the last letter which was yours. It’s very hard to make decision at that time but I know, I have to give you the letter. In a rush, I rode the bike to fast that I fell and bruised myself. But I went to your house anyway.
- Yeah, that explains the blood in your foot.
- Jim, despite the fact that I was in trouble, I came to you delivering something that you really need at that time. No, this isn’t about me. But Jim, you never really appreciate people who come and go in your life. You took them for granted. All you care was yourself. Nothing more that yourself and your ambition. But people struggled for you yet you didn’t care. Far from giving them a sense of appreciation. Remember the little girl who was in the park? The one who found your wallet? She saw you dropped the wallet. She picked the wallet and ran to you. Did you say thank you? No you didn’t. And do you know what happened to that little girl after she gave you your wallet? She was accidently abandoned by her parents who thought she was at the back of their car and was raped because she was lost.
At that point, I was shocked. I remember that incident close to my head. I was about to pay for my flight ticket and if it wasn’t for that girl, I could never have flown to US. I didn’t even care to say thanks and ask her where’s her parents.
- So you see my friend, everyone who comes in our life play a very important role in shaping where we’re heading.
- Oh I am sorry, I didn’t know...
- It’s okay... The girl is okay now. She’s a policewoman because of you. See how you play an impact towards other people lives.
Then the man disappears. When I still need to ask questions, he disappears. But then, I felt guilty and worthless. All this while, I thought I have been helping people. But I didn’t seem to notice how others are helping me too.
- So how was your first meeting?
Out of nowhere, Arthur suddenly stands by my side.
- Educating.
- Good. You’re learning.
- But why now? Why not when I was still alive?
- One step at a time my friend. One step at a time. You will meet your second person now.
Then a figure of a lady appears. Black long shiny hair. White dress. 2 inches heels. Singing. Very beautiful voice.... “think of me, think of fondly when we’ll say goodbye...
- Mandy!
- Hello Jim.
- Hello...?
I was at home. Yeah. My home when I was 19. I can smell the wooden structure of my house. And my mother’s cooking. I can smell my father blowing smoke of his cigar. I look around but I see nobody.
- At ease Jim, relax. You’re in good hand.
- Who are you? Where am I?
- Clearly Jim, this is your house when you’re 19. You’re still living with your parents remember. And me, oh, you don’t know me. I don’t know you too. Not until I die. I have been waiting for you.
- Waiting for me? Wanting me dead?
- Don’t be confused my friend. I can wait forever for you. In utmost of my concern, I never wanted you to die, but yes, sooner or later, we will.
- Who are you?
- Let us sit down Jim and I will explain to you.
Suddenly, out of nowhere, two chairs appeared before us.
- Common, help yourself.
The man sits and looks at me. Direct to the eyes. I decided to stand.
- On your own good time, you will sit my friend. I’m here, as ordered, as the first person who will tell you the first part of your life. Happened to me when I die and now, my obligation is to wait for you. And trust me, you will too.
- What is this about? It’s cracking my head.
- Oh well, let me begin. My name is Stan and I am a postman. See this uniform. I was the guy who sent you the letter of acceptance to Yale. See it in your mind?
Then the image holds before me. It was 20 years ago. I was sitting down, reading newspaper. My mom was cooking and father was sitting while puffing his cigar. A man knocked at the door and I opened it.
- I remember you. You were the guy...
- Indeed I am. I was the guy who gave you the letter. You see Jim, being a postman is not easy. Early that morning, my boss and I had a big quarrel. He accused me of stealing a cheque that I have never seen before. But it was like any other day. I didn’t bother much because I know I didn’t steal the cheque. I remember that your big letter was the last letter I have to deliver that day. Right before that, my boss called and said that the police are looking for me. I panicked although I know, I was innocent. My boss said that I need to return the cheque or otherwise I’ll be in prison. I wanted to run away. Those days, your boss is your master. When they accuse you of something, you are guilty of it.
That is the time I sit.
- But you weren’t guilty. I remember watching television that night and the news said that your boss went bankrupt.
- Yes, true. Besides being the boss of our delivery company, he owns an entertainment club. He tried to run from bankruptcy and accused me of stealing his cheque. But remember Jim, this isn’t about me. This is about you.
- Yes...
- So you see Jim, I was riding my bike as usual and as stupid as I was that day, I did try to run away. But I remember the last letter which was yours. It’s very hard to make decision at that time but I know, I have to give you the letter. In a rush, I rode the bike to fast that I fell and bruised myself. But I went to your house anyway.
- Yeah, that explains the blood in your foot.
- Jim, despite the fact that I was in trouble, I came to you delivering something that you really need at that time. No, this isn’t about me. But Jim, you never really appreciate people who come and go in your life. You took them for granted. All you care was yourself. Nothing more that yourself and your ambition. But people struggled for you yet you didn’t care. Far from giving them a sense of appreciation. Remember the little girl who was in the park? The one who found your wallet? She saw you dropped the wallet. She picked the wallet and ran to you. Did you say thank you? No you didn’t. And do you know what happened to that little girl after she gave you your wallet? She was accidently abandoned by her parents who thought she was at the back of their car and was raped because she was lost.
At that point, I was shocked. I remember that incident close to my head. I was about to pay for my flight ticket and if it wasn’t for that girl, I could never have flown to US. I didn’t even care to say thanks and ask her where’s her parents.
- So you see my friend, everyone who comes in our life play a very important role in shaping where we’re heading.
- Oh I am sorry, I didn’t know...
- It’s okay... The girl is okay now. She’s a policewoman because of you. See how you play an impact towards other people lives.
Then the man disappears. When I still need to ask questions, he disappears. But then, I felt guilty and worthless. All this while, I thought I have been helping people. But I didn’t seem to notice how others are helping me too.
- So how was your first meeting?
Out of nowhere, Arthur suddenly stands by my side.
- Educating.
- Good. You’re learning.
- But why now? Why not when I was still alive?
- One step at a time my friend. One step at a time. You will meet your second person now.
Then a figure of a lady appears. Black long shiny hair. White dress. 2 inches heels. Singing. Very beautiful voice.... “think of me, think of fondly when we’ll say goodbye...
- Mandy!
8 People You Are Going To Meet In Heaven (Part 2)
The Beginning
It was dark. And I think I’m standing alone. I didn’t know where I was until a light suddenly flashed and a very bright being stand in front of me. She (I think) stood and watched me for a minute. Smiling.
- You have no idea where you are, don’t you?
- Who are you? Where am I?
- You are at the gate of heaven...
- What? Come again...?
- Just a while ago, your car crashed because you were sleepy. And then you’re here...
- Excuse me?
- Oh I forgot. You were always this slow. I watched you every day since the first day you were born.
- Right. And who are you again?
- I am your Guardian Angel, Jim.
- I’m sorry. I really need to attend a meeting now. I don’t know who you are and if you don’t mind showing me the way back to my car, please...
- You died 5 minutes ago!
And that was the joke of the day. Dead. Right. Like hello, I am late now. I am on my way to a meeting. A very important one. Been looking forward to this meeting since 3 months ago. A development project. Safe one. Will not ruin the environment. Will give the community work. Will give the town a boost in architecture. Common, I’m late. Just show me my way back.
- Oh Jim, I know you’re slow but not stupid. Look around you. What can you see? Nothing. You are practically dead!
- Then why am I here talking to you when I am supposedly dead?
- Like I said, I am your guardian angel
I looked at the face of the bright being. Angel huh? The where are the wings?
- How low is your mind now Jim? Certainly you know that not all of us appear to you with wings.
- I don’t have time for this. Please, just show me the way back to my car. I pay u.
- You are a changed man, Jim. Long time ago, you are not a man you are now. Let me show you what happened to you just now.
And at a blink of an eye, I saw myself lying on the road. Thick blood coming out from my head and chest. My car crashed to a nearby hill. Not long after, people started to stop their cars. Looking at me terrified. I hear people calling the police. And I also hear scream of sacredness. Now I remember. I was sleepy and tired and stressed. I remember the accident. But I was alive. I managed to go out of the car. But that was it. And everything seems different after that.
- What you see now is yourself. You are now dead, Jim. Don’t worry though. You’re body will be taken care of.
- It couldn’t be. I’m young. I’m not ready for this.
- Things aren’t as you wished it to be. And it could happen at the least time you expect it to be.
- But why can’t I feel pain? Why am I not sad?
- Oh Jim... how naive you are now. You used to know that death is like sleeping. You don’t feel anything.
At that point I know the claim-to-be my guardian angel is telling the truth.
- My name is Arthur, your guardian angel. I know all things about you. ALL.
I look around me. Suddenly it’s dark again and I can only see Arthur. He’s beautiful and moderately a figure of a woman, but I was wrong. He says that his name is Arthur and that’s a guy’s name.
- Don’t worry about my name Jim. Whether you like it or not, you’re dead but this is not the end for you. You are going to meet 8 people you’ve encountered in your life before you move to next stage.
- What 8 people? What next stage?
- Patience’s a virtue Jim. One thing at a time.
This is confusing. 8 people? Next stage? I’m dead?
- Some of the people you are going to meet played an important stage in your life. You might not recall them but they did play a very crucial part in your life. They have been waiting for you.
Oh sure, they want me dead. How awesome is that...
- Often in your life, you questions how things doesn’t go your way. How confused you were at times and how wrong your life was. These people will be explaining to you bits by bits until you realize what your life was really like and come to understand it. This is important before you move to the next stage.
- What next stage? What for?
- You will see Jim. This is the first person you are going to meet.
Then it was cloudy and cold. Soft wind blew and I felt like I was flying. Then I saw a man. He’s in uniform carrying a sling bag. Walking slowly approaching me.
It was dark. And I think I’m standing alone. I didn’t know where I was until a light suddenly flashed and a very bright being stand in front of me. She (I think) stood and watched me for a minute. Smiling.
- You have no idea where you are, don’t you?
- Who are you? Where am I?
- You are at the gate of heaven...
- What? Come again...?
- Just a while ago, your car crashed because you were sleepy. And then you’re here...
- Excuse me?
- Oh I forgot. You were always this slow. I watched you every day since the first day you were born.
- Right. And who are you again?
- I am your Guardian Angel, Jim.
- I’m sorry. I really need to attend a meeting now. I don’t know who you are and if you don’t mind showing me the way back to my car, please...
- You died 5 minutes ago!
And that was the joke of the day. Dead. Right. Like hello, I am late now. I am on my way to a meeting. A very important one. Been looking forward to this meeting since 3 months ago. A development project. Safe one. Will not ruin the environment. Will give the community work. Will give the town a boost in architecture. Common, I’m late. Just show me my way back.
- Oh Jim, I know you’re slow but not stupid. Look around you. What can you see? Nothing. You are practically dead!
- Then why am I here talking to you when I am supposedly dead?
- Like I said, I am your guardian angel
I looked at the face of the bright being. Angel huh? The where are the wings?
- How low is your mind now Jim? Certainly you know that not all of us appear to you with wings.
- I don’t have time for this. Please, just show me the way back to my car. I pay u.
- You are a changed man, Jim. Long time ago, you are not a man you are now. Let me show you what happened to you just now.
And at a blink of an eye, I saw myself lying on the road. Thick blood coming out from my head and chest. My car crashed to a nearby hill. Not long after, people started to stop their cars. Looking at me terrified. I hear people calling the police. And I also hear scream of sacredness. Now I remember. I was sleepy and tired and stressed. I remember the accident. But I was alive. I managed to go out of the car. But that was it. And everything seems different after that.
- What you see now is yourself. You are now dead, Jim. Don’t worry though. You’re body will be taken care of.
- It couldn’t be. I’m young. I’m not ready for this.
- Things aren’t as you wished it to be. And it could happen at the least time you expect it to be.
- But why can’t I feel pain? Why am I not sad?
- Oh Jim... how naive you are now. You used to know that death is like sleeping. You don’t feel anything.
At that point I know the claim-to-be my guardian angel is telling the truth.
- My name is Arthur, your guardian angel. I know all things about you. ALL.
I look around me. Suddenly it’s dark again and I can only see Arthur. He’s beautiful and moderately a figure of a woman, but I was wrong. He says that his name is Arthur and that’s a guy’s name.
- Don’t worry about my name Jim. Whether you like it or not, you’re dead but this is not the end for you. You are going to meet 8 people you’ve encountered in your life before you move to next stage.
- What 8 people? What next stage?
- Patience’s a virtue Jim. One thing at a time.
This is confusing. 8 people? Next stage? I’m dead?
- Some of the people you are going to meet played an important stage in your life. You might not recall them but they did play a very crucial part in your life. They have been waiting for you.
Oh sure, they want me dead. How awesome is that...
- Often in your life, you questions how things doesn’t go your way. How confused you were at times and how wrong your life was. These people will be explaining to you bits by bits until you realize what your life was really like and come to understand it. This is important before you move to the next stage.
- What next stage? What for?
- You will see Jim. This is the first person you are going to meet.
Then it was cloudy and cold. Soft wind blew and I felt like I was flying. Then I saw a man. He’s in uniform carrying a sling bag. Walking slowly approaching me.
8 People You Are Going To Meet In Heaven (Part 1)
The Induction
From your first cry as a baby, many had come into your life. They come for a reason sometimes reasons. And yes, they come in season, maybe once or twice of a lifetime or maybe one you see and meet everyday. Sometimes, you know it and sometimes, you just won't realized it.
These people might stay long or short, giving us either big or small impact of our life. But they did put their influence on us, whether or not we realize it.
They have come to support us through a difficulty , to give us with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually.
Now, each and every single person we meet in this world come for a reason. When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person. When one is in your life for a cause, it is typically to meet a need you have put acrossed.
They may seem like a godsend, a guardian angel and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be.
Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away, leaving us not knowing what to do. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.
This is my version of the 8 people you are going to meet in Heaven. My idea of heaven is only imaginary as all people and all religions have their own way of putting heaven to definition. Mine is just mine and doesn't reflect the true motion of heaven as in generic terms. This writing is inspired by Mitch Albom's The Five People You Meet In Heaven.
(to be continued)
From your first cry as a baby, many had come into your life. They come for a reason sometimes reasons. And yes, they come in season, maybe once or twice of a lifetime or maybe one you see and meet everyday. Sometimes, you know it and sometimes, you just won't realized it.
These people might stay long or short, giving us either big or small impact of our life. But they did put their influence on us, whether or not we realize it.
They have come to support us through a difficulty , to give us with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually.
Now, each and every single person we meet in this world come for a reason. When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person. When one is in your life for a cause, it is typically to meet a need you have put acrossed.They may seem like a godsend, a guardian angel and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be.
Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away, leaving us not knowing what to do. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.
This is my version of the 8 people you are going to meet in Heaven. My idea of heaven is only imaginary as all people and all religions have their own way of putting heaven to definition. Mine is just mine and doesn't reflect the true motion of heaven as in generic terms. This writing is inspired by Mitch Albom's The Five People You Meet In Heaven.
(to be continued)
Gur and Danjoe's Christmas Open House
The Open House Celebration at Bingkor and Bandukan, Keningau was a great one. I personally had a blast. Thanks to our dearest friends, Mr. Andy and Mr. Danjoe, my Christmas wouldn't be merrier. These are some of the photos I've taken during the party in both venues. More of the photos can also be viewed at http://nedelicious.fotopages.com.
Believe - Polar Express
.... I love this song and I love this anime ....
Children, sleeping.
Snow is softly falling.
Dreams are calling,
Like bells in the distance.
We were dreamers,
Not so long ago.
But one by one, we
All had to grow up.
When it seems the magic slipped away...
We find it all again on Christmas Day.
Believe in what your heart is saying,
Hear the melody that's playing.
There's no time to waste,
There so much to celebrate.
Believe in what you feel inside,
Give your dreams the wings to fly.
You have everything you need, if you just believe.
Trains move quickly
To their journey's end.
Destinations...
Are where we begin again.
Ships go sailing,
Far across the sea.
Trusting starlight,
To get where they need to be.
When it seems that we have lost our way...
We find ourselves again on Christmas Day.
Believe in what your heart is saying,
Hear the melody that's playing
There's no time to waste,
There so much to celebrate.
Believe in what you feel inside,
And give your dreams the wings to fly.
You have everything you need, if you just Believe.
If you just believe.
If you just believe.
If you just believe...just believe...just believe.
Children, sleeping.
Snow is softly falling.
Dreams are calling,
Like bells in the distance.
We were dreamers,
Not so long ago.
But one by one, we
All had to grow up.
When it seems the magic slipped away...
We find it all again on Christmas Day.
Believe in what your heart is saying,
Hear the melody that's playing.
There's no time to waste,
There so much to celebrate.
Believe in what you feel inside,
Give your dreams the wings to fly.
You have everything you need, if you just believe.
Trains move quickly
To their journey's end.
Destinations...
Are where we begin again.
Ships go sailing,
Far across the sea.
Trusting starlight,
To get where they need to be.
When it seems that we have lost our way...
We find ourselves again on Christmas Day.
Believe in what your heart is saying,
Hear the melody that's playing
There's no time to waste,
There so much to celebrate.
Believe in what you feel inside,
And give your dreams the wings to fly.
You have everything you need, if you just Believe.
If you just believe.
If you just believe.
If you just believe...just believe...just believe.
This is not a Christmas Story?
Nope, I haven't watch A Christmas Carol yet. And I missed both Ondu and Nel's pre-Christmas party. I'm at home trying to figure out what's the best thing that had happened in my life this 2009.
.............
~ Family ~
~ Relatives ~
~ Friends ~
~ Relationship ~
~ Love ~
~ Career ~
~ Future plans ~
.............
~ Family ~
~ Relatives ~
~ Friends ~
~ Relationship ~
~ Love ~
~ Career ~
~ Future plans ~
You lose something, you gain something. That's how life is and was. Been blessed with a loving family and relatives. And my Elparanza Family, you guys are still the best.
Met new friends along the way. I miss you guys too. And I believe that you guys came for a reason, if not reasons, in my life. Thanks for making my year even worth living.
New hobby, photography. Yup, still learning and learning.
..... xoxo ......
Dear Santa, don't give me the crap that you know whether or not I have been good or bad. I didn't say you exist neither do I say you're not. I see in movies, yes, long beard, amazing cute tummy, those eyes with glasses and that red attire and your ho ho ho too. And some version, with Mrs. Claus! Don't get me wrong. I have nothing againgst you and I hope you don't take my word seriously but please, send me blissful love and tenderness. Not in a box. Oh, I forgot. Send me my Christmas spirit again.... Long, once upon a time, 9 years ago. Hard. Tough.
I miss you dad, you're my first man!
I'm sure the best is yet to come and I will wait patiently.
I want to feel how good it was to love and be loved, again.
I want to further my study.
Hope my apartment is done!
2010, come what may.
I love God. And I love my family. And relatives. And friends. And my career too.
My name is Ned and I will be ready!
The Butterfly Who Knows How To Model!
I love photography so much. In so many ways, I'm still learning and still need to improve. Recently, I managed to capture the most intriguing butterfly I ever saw. It didn't fly away although I was quite close to it. I don't have a macro lens, yet, and because of that, I need to be closer to the object I needed to snap. Coming back to the butterfly, not only that it didn't run but it also models, giving me a number of beautiful snaps. These are some of the photos.
I'm new and yes, there's still so much more to learn..
Miri, Kuching, Mukah, Kota Marudu, Ranau dan Sandakan di Kota Kinabalu
......................
Entry kali ini bermula sangat humble. Clash antara dua benda, perjumpaan besar-besaran Elparanza dan kedatangan teman-teman dari Kuching dan Miri.
Sangat ternanti-nanti keduanya, takut mengecewakan juga. Jadi entry untuk ini adalah kunjungan mereka ke Kota Kinabalu. Ada yang baru dan ada juga yang lebih baru. Kadang-kadang takut juga untuk mendekatkan diri. Tapi sekarang takut dilupakan.
Mungkin perasaan itu ganjil tapi ada. Harap akan terus ada. Dengan sedikit motivasi, mungkin berupa sms atau kadang-kadang panggilan telefon mahupun YM atau facebook, rasanya perasaan itu tidak akan hilang.
Mungkin entry ini pendek sebab rasanya mereka tahu betapa beberapa hari ini penuh dengan kesibukkan sendiri dan kejayaan peribadi mengenali dengan lebih dekat mereka-mereka yang terbabit. Jadi, dari pandangan jauh dan mata kasar, rasanya mereka tahu betapa mereka akan diingati dan dikenang selalu. Masih banyak pokok-pokok batu, rokok-rokok, gambar-gambar dan minuman yang belum habis, jangan malu-malu membawa kaki ke sini lagi.
Sambil baring-baring meneliti gambar yang diambil, rasanya rasa rindu semakin menebal. Ah, esokla meneliti gambar. Sambung rindu esok pula.
...........................
Datang lagi Kuching dan Miri.
Entry kali ini bermula sangat humble. Clash antara dua benda, perjumpaan besar-besaran Elparanza dan kedatangan teman-teman dari Kuching dan Miri.
Sangat ternanti-nanti keduanya, takut mengecewakan juga. Jadi entry untuk ini adalah kunjungan mereka ke Kota Kinabalu. Ada yang baru dan ada juga yang lebih baru. Kadang-kadang takut juga untuk mendekatkan diri. Tapi sekarang takut dilupakan.
Mungkin perasaan itu ganjil tapi ada. Harap akan terus ada. Dengan sedikit motivasi, mungkin berupa sms atau kadang-kadang panggilan telefon mahupun YM atau facebook, rasanya perasaan itu tidak akan hilang.
Mungkin entry ini pendek sebab rasanya mereka tahu betapa beberapa hari ini penuh dengan kesibukkan sendiri dan kejayaan peribadi mengenali dengan lebih dekat mereka-mereka yang terbabit. Jadi, dari pandangan jauh dan mata kasar, rasanya mereka tahu betapa mereka akan diingati dan dikenang selalu. Masih banyak pokok-pokok batu, rokok-rokok, gambar-gambar dan minuman yang belum habis, jangan malu-malu membawa kaki ke sini lagi.
Sambil baring-baring meneliti gambar yang diambil, rasanya rasa rindu semakin menebal. Ah, esokla meneliti gambar. Sambung rindu esok pula.
...........................
Datang lagi Kuching dan Miri.
My First Studio Photo Shoot
Studio photo shoot at Ondu's Home Studio gave me the opportunity to work with lights and of course editing. I still have so much to learn and I am grateful my other photographer friends for sharing the experience, knowledge and skills that they have. This is my first experience on studio photography and hope I can learn and expand more.
Please feel free to give comment and suggestion.
I See the Light
Please feel free to give comment and suggestion.
I See the Light
Confused???
Distracted
Judgemental
EnviousModels
Gidong & Jae
Pasal Dia ...
Hari ini entry, bukan pasal saya... Dipesan untuk mengisi poket sebelum bergerak ke sana buat saya tertanya-tanya tapi tidak apa. Nasib ada projek penanggung makan dan belanja. Dia kata dia sudah jumpa jalan itu. Baguslah. Memang semua orang harus jumpa jalan-jalan dalam hidup. Kadang-kadang saya juga jumpa jalan di tengah jalan, tapi saya takut terus pusing ke belakang atau tidak bergerak langsung. Jadi bila orang lain jumpa jalan dan terus berjalan, saya sedikit cemburu dan terharu. Bangga dengan mereka.
Ada sebabnya mengapa dia jumpa jalan itu. Saya dapat merasakan betapa jalan itu sudah ditunggu-tunggu lama. Biarlah dia teman-teman. Itu suka dan hidup dia. Pastinya dia cukup sedar apa yang terbaik dalam hidup dia.
... I shall be telling this with a sigh,Somewhere ages and ages hence,
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, and I -
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
Ko sudah jumpa jalan itu. Baguslah. Tapi saya, bila lagi...???Terima Kasih Miri...
Satu hujung minggu yang macam kamus.. belajar banyak benda, maksud lain-lain...
Macam lagu ST12 Saat Terakhir... Satu jam saja ku telah bisa sayangi kamu....
Hahahaha...
Baru balik dari Miri... Penat... Tidak tahu apa mahu buat sekarang... Diam-diam scrolling gambar berjumlah 1738... Tiba-tiba rasa sunyi... di kalangan ramai orang...
Dia sudah jumpa jalan itu... Saya bila lagi...
Terima Kasih Miri...
Dia sudah jumpa jalan itu... Saya bila lagi...
Terima Kasih Miri...
I've Watch New Moon!
Okay fine!It's not like what I expected it to be but it's okay. Learning from my past experiences, books are always better than the movie. They skipped many scenes but I can take that. It would be impossible to follow everything from the book, don't you guys think? They left a few parts out, but it was for cinematic reasons and the missing parts did not seriously effect the overall understanding of New Moon. Books are always more detail than movies. Nevertheless, I enjoyed the movie. Better sight of the lines now, if you know what I mean.
I know it's not fair to compare but we have to do it to understand the series more, or at least the movie, for some who haven't read the books yet.
I' now reading Eclipse, the 3d series of the Saga. I've read Stephenie Meyer is coming out with the 5th book, Midnight Sun but because of leaking case, I'm still not sure whether or not, she's going to continue writing it. Btw, I have all 4 books of the Twilight Saga Series :p
I am aware that most readers of the book are girls. As I watch the movie last Sunday, girls from all corners of my side were like giggling, sighing and even screamed. I forgive them for sure, hahaha. It's their thing maybe. Edward and Jacob as well as the Quileutes brothers are indeed studs.
I am aware that most readers of the book are girls. As I watch the movie last Sunday, girls from all corners of my side were like giggling, sighing and even screamed. I forgive them for sure, hahaha. It's their thing maybe. Edward and Jacob as well as the Quileutes brothers are indeed studs.
The Warewolves QuileutesBut honestly, this second installment of the series may satisfy hardcore fans, but outsiders, those who haven't read or watch Twilight are likely to be turned off by its slow pace, relentlessly downcast tone and excessive length. In the absence of the first movie, the connection between Bella and Edward didn't seem quite as strong. Bella seemed tortured after Edward left but the book expressed it better then the movie.I've read reviews of this movie and the conclusion is, people will either love it or hate it. How about you people?
I just leave you guys with that thought. But I am still a fan of the Twilight Saga. The movie was good but I think the book is better.
P/s: I don't know. Although there's only little of Dakota Fanning in the movie, somehow, she managed to 'overlapped' all the other characters? Was it just me or she's THAT good?
I just leave you guys with that thought. But I am still a fan of the Twilight Saga. The movie was good but I think the book is better.
P/s: I don't know. Although there's only little of Dakota Fanning in the movie, somehow, she managed to 'overlapped' all the other characters? Was it just me or she's THAT good?
The Story of the Butterfly
A man found a cocoon of a butterfly.
One day a small opening appeared.
He sat and watched the butterfly for several hours
as it struggled to squeeze its body through the tiny hole.
Then it stopped, as if it couldn't go further.
ButterflySo the man decided to help the butterfly.
He took a pair of scissors and
snipped off the remaining bits of cocoon.
The butterfly emerged easily but
it had a swollen body and shriveled wings.
The man continued to watch it,
expecting that any minute the wings would enlarge
and expand enough to support the body,
Neither happened!
In fact the butterfly spent the rest of its life
crawling around.
It was never able to fly.
What the man in his kindness
and haste did not understand:
The restricting cocoon and the struggle
required by the butterfly to get through the opening
was a way of forcing the fluid from the body
into the wings so that it would be ready
for flight once that was achieved.
Sometimes struggles are exactly
what we need in our lives.
Going through life with no obstacles would cripple us.
We will not be as strong as we could have been
and we would never fly.
One day a small opening appeared.
He sat and watched the butterfly for several hours
as it struggled to squeeze its body through the tiny hole.
Then it stopped, as if it couldn't go further.
ButterflySo the man decided to help the butterfly.
He took a pair of scissors and
snipped off the remaining bits of cocoon.
The butterfly emerged easily but
it had a swollen body and shriveled wings.
The man continued to watch it,
expecting that any minute the wings would enlarge
and expand enough to support the body,
Neither happened!
In fact the butterfly spent the rest of its life
crawling around.
It was never able to fly.
What the man in his kindness
and haste did not understand:
The restricting cocoon and the struggle
required by the butterfly to get through the opening
was a way of forcing the fluid from the body
into the wings so that it would be ready
for flight once that was achieved.
Sometimes struggles are exactly
what we need in our lives.
Going through life with no obstacles would cripple us.
We will not be as strong as we could have been
and we would never fly.
Happy Birthday En. Gur!
Age and Laughter
Happy birthday, you’re not getting old,
Stay in the game, it’s not time to fold.
Wrinkles and grey hair, are just a new look,
Countless experiences, you should write in a book.
A birthday is seldom, a serious occasion,
Try not to take it, like the d-day invasion.
Laughter and jokes are within sight,
Stock up on both, all through the night.
Happy Birthday Bro Gurangak
Happy birthday, you’re not getting old,
Stay in the game, it’s not time to fold.
Wrinkles and grey hair, are just a new look,
Countless experiences, you should write in a book.
A birthday is seldom, a serious occasion,
Try not to take it, like the d-day invasion.
Laughter and jokes are within sight,
Stock up on both, all through the night.
Happy Birthday Bro Gurangak
May God Bless You Completely
May God bless you completely
And may
You be a blessing too
Granting
Others a path to enlightenment through the
Delight in you
Beacons of light
Let us be
Energy that we might shine
So that the good & divine
Send more of a lifeline ever so sweetly
And may
You be a blessing too
Granting
Others a path to enlightenment through the
Delight in you
Beacons of light
Let us be
Energy that we might shine
So that the good & divine
Send more of a lifeline ever so sweetly
You, may God bless you completelyOn top of what you
Usually see
Completely
Outward, inward, indiscreetly
May you be blessed as God has blessed me
Peace be with you always
Love be with you
Endlessly
Truth be yours forever
Each breath never friendless be
Let today make
You receptive...
... To the gift that's come to pass
May God bless you completely
And may you realize that He has
Usually see
Completely
Outward, inward, indiscreetly
May you be blessed as God has blessed me
Peace be with you always
Love be with you
Endlessly
Truth be yours forever
Each breath never friendless be
Let today make
You receptive...
... To the gift that's come to passMay God bless you completely
And may you realize that He has
Kudos Bunkface?
Whenever I see this add on TV, it made me laugh. First, the graphic and literal content of the add is quite obvious but what I am more interested is the idea of it. Who came out with such cool and creative idea?
That's why for me, it's never about the actor or actress. It's all about the producer. I mean, yes, the protagonists and antagonists do play a very crucial and significant role but I'm more the 'background' kinda guy.
So again, I just want to say, job well done to the one who came out with the idea and everyone who had made the commercial a simple laugh to look at :)
That's why for me, it's never about the actor or actress. It's all about the producer. I mean, yes, the protagonists and antagonists do play a very crucial and significant role but I'm more the 'background' kinda guy.
So again, I just want to say, job well done to the one who came out with the idea and everyone who had made the commercial a simple laugh to look at :)
Sorry, I am NOT Naked!
Yes! I am very opinionated and very expressive. Some even said that I'm too bold for everything. Tidak tahu malulah and so forth. I tend to say things inside my mind just like that. But I'm not the kind of person who throws everything directly. Sometimes too, I kept it to myself. I know, some things are better left unsaid.
Kadang-kadang juga orang kata aku terlalu berani. Berlagak dan sombong. Ketawa kecil aku dengan kenyataan begitu. Belum jadi artis lagi dah ada bahan gosip. Entah-entah bila dah jadi famous nanti macam baju aku 'I'm gonna be famouse' yang dihadiahkan rakan ku, kejadian apa yang menimpah pun, aku tak tau. Yang penting, aku rasa biasa jer.
Dalam blog ni juga, orang kata aku nak show off. Ada aku kesah? Hahaha... asyik posting ada gambar aku. Mungkin orang tu tak tau, aku posting gambar aku sebab dalam entry tu, aku berceritera tentang diri aku. Tapi lantaklah orang nak kata apa. Tapi kali ni ada gambar lain sikit. Saja nak support tajuk di atas. Naked truth, mungkin. Aku bukannya apa. Aku tidak seperti yang korang nilai. Aku macam biasa saja. Orang kebanyakkan yang punyai passion dalam blogging. Aku suka pada blog. Pernah terhenti sebentar akibat kesibukkan dan ghairah facebook yang melampau. Tapi blogging sepertinya cinta pertama aku. Tak boleh lupa walaupun bukan depan mata.
Aku tidak akan berkata apa-apa melainkan logikku mengatakan 'ok benda ni harus diperkatakan' dan aku juga bukan jenis yang fanatik terhadap diri sendiri. Obses kepada diri sendiri, aku bukan. Aku suka photography. Aku suka seni dan aku suka artistik.
Apa yang cuba aku buktikan di sini adalah, aku sama seperti orang lain. Mungkin lain sedikit daripada segi pemikiran dan kebiasaan tapi aku tetap sama.
Kadang-kadang juga orang kata aku terlalu berani. Berlagak dan sombong. Ketawa kecil aku dengan kenyataan begitu. Belum jadi artis lagi dah ada bahan gosip. Entah-entah bila dah jadi famous nanti macam baju aku 'I'm gonna be famouse' yang dihadiahkan rakan ku, kejadian apa yang menimpah pun, aku tak tau. Yang penting, aku rasa biasa jer.
Dalam blog ni juga, orang kata aku nak show off. Ada aku kesah? Hahaha... asyik posting ada gambar aku. Mungkin orang tu tak tau, aku posting gambar aku sebab dalam entry tu, aku berceritera tentang diri aku. Tapi lantaklah orang nak kata apa. Tapi kali ni ada gambar lain sikit. Saja nak support tajuk di atas. Naked truth, mungkin. Aku bukannya apa. Aku tidak seperti yang korang nilai. Aku macam biasa saja. Orang kebanyakkan yang punyai passion dalam blogging. Aku suka pada blog. Pernah terhenti sebentar akibat kesibukkan dan ghairah facebook yang melampau. Tapi blogging sepertinya cinta pertama aku. Tak boleh lupa walaupun bukan depan mata.
Aku tidak akan berkata apa-apa melainkan logikku mengatakan 'ok benda ni harus diperkatakan' dan aku juga bukan jenis yang fanatik terhadap diri sendiri. Obses kepada diri sendiri, aku bukan. Aku suka photography. Aku suka seni dan aku suka artistik.Apa yang cuba aku buktikan di sini adalah, aku sama seperti orang lain. Mungkin lain sedikit daripada segi pemikiran dan kebiasaan tapi aku tetap sama.
Cuti Sudah...
Nah, cuti sudah.
Ungkapan yang disukai ramai. Banyak plan tersusun. Sama ada oleh diri sendiri dan orang lain. Tapi kenapa masih terbaring lesu di atas tilam?
Tengok punya tengok. Rupanya haribulan belum sampai lagi. Lah, lagaknya gah pada tajuk sahaja rupanya. Aya, susah juga bercuti tanpa dapat melakukan sebarang plan. Perlukah melakukannya seorang diri? Maksud saya, berjalan ke sini dan ke mari. Patutkah? Sebab mereka yang lain tiada cuti. Tidak cuti. Mungkin belum lagi.
Terasa panggilan kota datang di telinga. Ahhh, mungkin ke Kota Kinabalu sahaja seperti biasa.
Ungkapan yang disukai ramai. Banyak plan tersusun. Sama ada oleh diri sendiri dan orang lain. Tapi kenapa masih terbaring lesu di atas tilam?
Tengok punya tengok. Rupanya haribulan belum sampai lagi. Lah, lagaknya gah pada tajuk sahaja rupanya. Aya, susah juga bercuti tanpa dapat melakukan sebarang plan. Perlukah melakukannya seorang diri? Maksud saya, berjalan ke sini dan ke mari. Patutkah? Sebab mereka yang lain tiada cuti. Tidak cuti. Mungkin belum lagi.
Terasa panggilan kota datang di telinga. Ahhh, mungkin ke Kota Kinabalu sahaja seperti biasa.
I Guess, It's Just Hard To Be Her ...
Whenever I started an entry, I will always think how relevant the topic is to the public. How far can my writing persuade the interest of my readers? Foremost, will my readers able to understand what I am trying to convey?
Now, let me go to the fact of the matter here. Last night, I went out with a bunch of friends. Yes, most of them are indeed my best and closest friends. After a gathering somewhere in KK , we went to have our usual ‘vocal practice’ where some of us ended up drunk. Happens all the time, I must confess. The thing was, yes, as usual too, I will be the driver for some of them and it happened that one my girl friend was a bit tipsy and slept on my shoulder the whole time while I was driving to send her back. There were just the two of us in the car after dropping off another friend of mine. Upon reaching her house, she suddenly cried and said “it’s nice to have a friend like you.” Sobbing and sobbing while speaking. I tried to calm her but ignorance was a blest. True enough, she started calming down after a while we were at the parking lot.
Then she said “Can I kiss you?”
I was a bit shocked but I did offer a french kiss for her convenience, to make it short. Now people, this is not like you thought it would be. We didn’t end up on anybody’s bed. It was a mere gentle kiss, maybe a bit passionate, but that was it. And she cried again. I tried to understand her but it all seems dark and out of place. Finally she said “I only ask that to someone I can trust”.
At that point, I understood what the tears were all about. She’s just lonely and wanted company, I assumed. I was there, stayed for a couple of minutes talking, wishing her mood will be gearing up soon until she said that it’s about time we go to inside the house. I was confused and a bit bothered. She’s looking at me, wanting to be understood. I said to her maybe not tonight. Or maybe, never on any other nights.
I took my leave after I was sure that she’s already inside the house. My mind wondered for explanation. Have I done the right thing?
It’s 4.38 am and suddenly my hp rang. It’s a text message saying “Ned, thanks for being such an understanding person. I was hoping that we can have lunch together today (since it’s already today) just the two of us. And I said, why not, it could be arranged.
I'm sitting as I wrote this, thinking, what would happened if I went with her to her house tonight. Would it be any different from my decision now? I can be wild on bed, yes, giving her a blast of the night. Naughty thought I know, but not to her. She’s so fragile and I don’t want to take advantage of that. I'm sorry for the tough life she had endured so far and I really wish to be a part of it, lending my shoulders to carry the burden with her. If she just give me the chance; I guess, it’s just hard to be her ...
Now, let me go to the fact of the matter here. Last night, I went out with a bunch of friends. Yes, most of them are indeed my best and closest friends. After a gathering somewhere in KK , we went to have our usual ‘vocal practice’ where some of us ended up drunk. Happens all the time, I must confess. The thing was, yes, as usual too, I will be the driver for some of them and it happened that one my girl friend was a bit tipsy and slept on my shoulder the whole time while I was driving to send her back. There were just the two of us in the car after dropping off another friend of mine. Upon reaching her house, she suddenly cried and said “it’s nice to have a friend like you.” Sobbing and sobbing while speaking. I tried to calm her but ignorance was a blest. True enough, she started calming down after a while we were at the parking lot.
Then she said “Can I kiss you?”
I was a bit shocked but I did offer a french kiss for her convenience, to make it short. Now people, this is not like you thought it would be. We didn’t end up on anybody’s bed. It was a mere gentle kiss, maybe a bit passionate, but that was it. And she cried again. I tried to understand her but it all seems dark and out of place. Finally she said “I only ask that to someone I can trust”.At that point, I understood what the tears were all about. She’s just lonely and wanted company, I assumed. I was there, stayed for a couple of minutes talking, wishing her mood will be gearing up soon until she said that it’s about time we go to inside the house. I was confused and a bit bothered. She’s looking at me, wanting to be understood. I said to her maybe not tonight. Or maybe, never on any other nights.
I took my leave after I was sure that she’s already inside the house. My mind wondered for explanation. Have I done the right thing?
It’s 4.38 am and suddenly my hp rang. It’s a text message saying “Ned, thanks for being such an understanding person. I was hoping that we can have lunch together today (since it’s already today) just the two of us. And I said, why not, it could be arranged.I'm sitting as I wrote this, thinking, what would happened if I went with her to her house tonight. Would it be any different from my decision now? I can be wild on bed, yes, giving her a blast of the night. Naughty thought I know, but not to her. She’s so fragile and I don’t want to take advantage of that. I'm sorry for the tough life she had endured so far and I really wish to be a part of it, lending my shoulders to carry the burden with her. If she just give me the chance; I guess, it’s just hard to be her ...
Until I'm Back Again...
Standing alone in a path,
Divided into patches of small ways,
Walking to a distance to find the will,
of memories faded and white, black
Listening only to the footsteps of my feet,
nothing else.
Looking back to the pastures I left behind,
The smiles and the cries,
Disappearing slowly in the midst of routines,
For survival and comfort.
I listen to, every now and then,
The debts I owe to my promises.
The hymns of angelic passion.
Can you hear it too?
There's one thing and one thing only,
The choice to be renewed in a house which isn't home,
To go back to the sweats of breezing wind,
Where the sun shine through trees.
Beautiful. Peace. Love.
Until I'm back again,
My lovely...
By Ned
10.45 a.m
Friday, 20th Nov 2009
Last day at school
Divided into patches of small ways,
Walking to a distance to find the will,
of memories faded and white, black
Listening only to the footsteps of my feet,
nothing else.
Looking back to the pastures I left behind,
The smiles and the cries,
Disappearing slowly in the midst of routines,
For survival and comfort.
I listen to, every now and then,
The debts I owe to my promises.
The hymns of angelic passion.
Can you hear it too?
There's one thing and one thing only,
The choice to be renewed in a house which isn't home,
To go back to the sweats of breezing wind,
Where the sun shine through trees.
Beautiful. Peace. Love.
Until I'm back again,
My lovely...
By Ned
10.45 a.m
Friday, 20th Nov 2009
Last day at school
Why Do I blog?
Okay, I started blogging since 2003. During my first year of blogging, I mainly blog of my uni years, sharing opinions and commenting on something. This is actually my 3rd blog after I've deleted 2 of my first blog. I have another blog but it's till under construction. I purposely make the under 'construction blog' for a very specific reason; motivation. I think it's going smooth now.
Okay, my top reasons for blogging now are still the same. Because I love and love to write. Although some of you might say that few of the entries in this blog were copied and then pasted to make as if it's mine, well, I won't differ. Yes but my reason of doing that is to make sure you guys know what I am talking about. I commented every article and stated crystal clear that I took it from somewhere else. Plus, I've also included the link of the article. Hope that's clear to you guys.
Another reason why I blog is the fact that, I love the internet so much that I've decided to give back something to the internet communities. This is what I call sharing. In fact, we can also meet new friends and extend our network to a wider perspectives. Not to mention on the knowledge and experience we gain.
And not to forget nuffnang or your respective add in your blog. It gives you money at a click. Who can say no to that? I mean, yeah, you're blogging and hoping people will give feedback and comments but now, you get paid for that. Cool isn't?
Okay, my top reasons for blogging now are still the same. Because I love and love to write. Although some of you might say that few of the entries in this blog were copied and then pasted to make as if it's mine, well, I won't differ. Yes but my reason of doing that is to make sure you guys know what I am talking about. I commented every article and stated crystal clear that I took it from somewhere else. Plus, I've also included the link of the article. Hope that's clear to you guys.
Another reason why I blog is the fact that, I love the internet so much that I've decided to give back something to the internet communities. This is what I call sharing. In fact, we can also meet new friends and extend our network to a wider perspectives. Not to mention on the knowledge and experience we gain.
And not to forget nuffnang or your respective add in your blog. It gives you money at a click. Who can say no to that? I mean, yeah, you're blogging and hoping people will give feedback and comments but now, you get paid for that. Cool isn't?
Aku dan Kisahku
Akhirnya, kerja lagi seminggu kemudian cuti. Rasa nak pergi jalan-jalan di tempat yang tidak pernah dilawati. Target utama, mestilah negeri sendiri, negeri di bawah bayu. Banyak lagi tempat yang rasa perlu dilawati. Untuk memahami hasil bumi sendiri kononnya.
Kadang-kadang juga rasa keliru nak tulis entry dalam BM atau BI. Bila tengok balik senarai pelawat, ada juga dari luar Malaysia yang memang tak faham Bahasa Malaysia. Tapi bila nak tulis Bahasa Inggeris, kata tak hormat bahasa sendiri. Aku sendiri sebenarnya gagal dalam bahasa ibunda. Lagaknya saja macam orang sendiri tapi rupanya tutur bahasa, jauh meleset. Tapi jangan nilai aku dengan bahasa yang aku pelajari atau gagal dipelajari. Nilai aku kerana perlakuan aku dan pemikiran aku. Aku masih orang di sini. Orang Malaysia yang menetap di Sabah!
Kadang-kadang juga rasa keliru nak tulis entry dalam BM atau BI. Bila tengok balik senarai pelawat, ada juga dari luar Malaysia yang memang tak faham Bahasa Malaysia. Tapi bila nak tulis Bahasa Inggeris, kata tak hormat bahasa sendiri. Aku sendiri sebenarnya gagal dalam bahasa ibunda. Lagaknya saja macam orang sendiri tapi rupanya tutur bahasa, jauh meleset. Tapi jangan nilai aku dengan bahasa yang aku pelajari atau gagal dipelajari. Nilai aku kerana perlakuan aku dan pemikiran aku. Aku masih orang di sini. Orang Malaysia yang menetap di Sabah!
Nah, tidak lama lagi Hari Krismas. Berapa hari lagi ah? Malas nak kira. Yang pentingnya, rasa Krismas tu mungkin pudar setelah 9 tahun lalu, telah berlaku kejadian yang aku percaya, tidak seorang pun mahu ianya berlaku. Tanggal 17 Dec setiap tahun adalah keramat bagi aku dan keluarga. Kepada saudara-saudara dan juga sahabat-sahabat dekat dan kalau ada yang jauh, terima kasihlah banyak-banyak. Tanggal yang memisahkan keluarga aku dengan ayah tercinta. Pahit rasanya nak diterima tapi boleh buat apa. Kalau sudah ajal dan rahsia alam di tangan yang Maha Esa.Apapun, sejenak berfikir, sudah tentunya Krismas itu patut diraihkan dengan hati yang gembira dengan penuh kesyukuran. Sama seperti perayaan lain yang harusnya disambut dengan penuh rasa keinsafan dan kegembiraan. Aku harap tahun ni, tidak seperti tahun-tahun lalu...
Hidup Biar Sedap!
Ok kawan-kawan sekalian. Satu soalan bonus untuk hari ini. Apa yang paling sedap di dunia ini? Bila digoogle, maka keluarlah search yang lebih merujuk kepada makanan. Maka betul lah benda paling sedap di dunia ini adalah makanan. Tapi aku terkesan sesuatu. Sedap itu sangat abstrak. Apa sahaja pun boleh dikaitkan dengan sedap. Mungkin juga tidur itu sedap. Apalagi kalau sudah penah seharian melakukan tugasan yang berat. Atau bila pergi ke massage centre. Urutan-urutan yang pelbagai jenis juga mungkin sangat sedap. Atau muzik juga. Alunan melodi dan irama yang sedap didengar. Atau, iya, permainan di bilik tidur juga sangat sedap. Dimulai dengan foreplay ringgan yang kemudiannya perlahan-perlahan menjadi perang yang hebat. Itu juga sedap, bukan?
Jadi gambar yang saya post ini, sebenarnya saja utk mencantikkan posting. Misi memperkenalkan diri kepada blogger-blogger yang lain sedang giat dijalankan. Jadi mungkin perlu diselitkan gambar setakat dua dan tiga. Kalau difikirkan perlu, takut juga kalau pembaca ada yang meluat tapi harapan tinggi agar sebaliknya. Kata tajuk di atas juga, hidup biar sedap. Jadi biasakanlah diri melihat sesuatu itu dari sudut positif terlebih dahulu kemudian barulah dilihat dari sudut yang lain pula. Kalau kawan beri kita lemon, kita buat just lemon yang dituang ke dalam gelas kristal cantik dan ramping dengan straw yang berwarna-warni!Ok, fine. Semua benda dalam dunia ini boleh dikaitkan dengan perkataan sedap. Walaupun sangat abstrak seperti yang saya telah katakan tadi, namum sedap itu punya hanya satu makna. Kita suka dengan benda itu. Kita suka kerana ianya membuatkan kita gembira, puas hati dan mahu melakukannya lagi. Terpulanglah kepada individu itu sendiri menafsir kemahuan diri dengan maksud perkataan sedap. Yang mahu saya sampaikan di sini pada hari ini adalah, hidup biar sedap!
Near To You - A Fine Frenzy
Another beautiful song I want to share with everybody
He and I had something beautiful
But so dysfunctional, it couldn't last
I loved him so but I let him go
'Cause I knew he'd never love me back
Such pain as this
Shouldn't have to be experienced
I'm still reeling from the loss,
Still a little bit delirious
Near to you, I am healing
But it's taking so long
'Cause though he's gone
And you are wonderful
It's hard to move on
Yet, I'm better near to you.
You and I have something different
And I'm enjoying it cautiously
I'm battle scarred, I am working oh so hard
To get back to who I used to be
He's disappearing
Fading subtly
I'm so close to being yours
Won't you stay with me
Please
Near to you, I am healing
But it's taking so long
'Cause though he's gone
And you are wonderful
It's hard to move on
Yet, I'm better near to you.
I only know that I am
Better where you are
I only know that I am
Better where you are
I only know that I belong
Where you are
Near to you, I am healing
But it's taking so long
Though he's gone
And you are wonderful
It's hard to move on
Near to you, I am healing
But it's taking so long
'Cause though he's gone
And you are wonderful
It's hard to move on
Yet, I'm better near to you.
Yet, I'm better near to you.
He and I had something beautiful
But so dysfunctional, it couldn't last
I loved him so but I let him go
'Cause I knew he'd never love me back
Such pain as this
Shouldn't have to be experienced
I'm still reeling from the loss,
Still a little bit delirious
Near to you, I am healing
But it's taking so long
'Cause though he's gone
And you are wonderful
It's hard to move on
Yet, I'm better near to you.
You and I have something different
And I'm enjoying it cautiously
I'm battle scarred, I am working oh so hard
To get back to who I used to be
He's disappearing
Fading subtly
I'm so close to being yours
Won't you stay with me
Please
Near to you, I am healing
But it's taking so long
'Cause though he's gone
And you are wonderful
It's hard to move on
Yet, I'm better near to you.
I only know that I am
Better where you are
I only know that I am
Better where you are
I only know that I belong
Where you are
Near to you, I am healing
But it's taking so long
Though he's gone
And you are wonderful
It's hard to move on
Near to you, I am healing
But it's taking so long
'Cause though he's gone
And you are wonderful
It's hard to move on
Yet, I'm better near to you.
Yet, I'm better near to you.
A Night of Salsa!
Okay guys, I'm going to be frank with all of you. Apart from reading and music, another passion of mine is dancing. Not that I'm very good at it but yes, I dance. I started dancing when I was 16 and took it seriously during my uni years. Of course it's hard when public are judging you; how pathetic and cynical the society are when you are a dancer especially towards male dancers but I'm the kind of guy who do as I please; as long as I am not breaking any rules and regulations.
Now, this is something I want to share with you. A night of Salsa. I learned a bit of this sexy dance while I was still studying. And then left it a go after that. Nevertheless, here and there, my close friends and I will always try to make a move to it. And this is a night I am looking forward to.
Okay, enough of that. So guys, if you happened to be in town, the details of A Night of Salsa are as follows;
Date: 21 Nov 2009
Venue: GROWBALL ENTERTAINMENT CENTRE, CENTRE POINT, KK
Time: 9 p.m. onwards
Ticket: RM 40 per pax (drinks included)
SPECIAL PRICE for STUDENTS: RM 30 (drinks included - Student ID must present)
Collect your tickets at:
CUBE restaurant & wine lounge, City Mall
Dance With Me Studio, Taman Iramanis
Further info:
Please contact Mei at 016 833 0888 and make your reservation for KK Salsa Night!
Don’t miss out on this exciting event!
My KL trip (16th-19th ) Oct 2009) 2 - Random Photos
Albert and Ollen
Love this one.. Thx to Danjoe for lending his D90 :)
Terpukau dengan wayang human meat ball..
B&W... Candid by Ollen
By Danjoe and his D90...My KL trip (16th-19th Oct 2009) - MSM Night
I went to KL last October and have been wanting to share with you guys the experience I have had. You see, this wasn't the usual trip I have as I've been to KL for so many times before. But this different. For the first time I ever, I will share my encounterment here in this blog. There are so many stories to tell and I hope these series of photos will say it all.
I was asked to join "Pertandingan Menyumbangkan Lagu".. Haha. I didn't win but I had fun. Never done this in my entire life... :)
I was asked to join "Pertandingan Menyumbangkan Lagu".. Haha. I didn't win but I had fun. Never done this in my entire life... :)
These are my new friends, well, most of them. I went there together with two other friends, which were seated left and right side of me..
And hmm... I was also asked to join some game and I think because of me, team kami kalah... Sorry kawan2... huhu
Yep, like I said it... Aku punca kekalahan itu.. huhu
Nevertheless, my comrades cuba sedaya upaday utk membantu.. hahaha
My two best buddies, from my right Ollen Maiku and Bosku Bert... :)
Well, that's it for now. I will have another entry on my KL trip once I have the chance to update.